Creativity counts. A personal ad can take many forms. A poem, perhaps. One amazing ad
consisted
entirely of titles -- one right after another -- of popular movies, carefully chosen and arranged to describe the
ad
placer.
Show them what YOU would want to know. Make a list of the most important things that you
would
like to know about a person before responding to an ad. Chances are, others would like to know the same about you.
If you
work, in what field? Have you ever been married before? Do you have children? Are you looking to make some new
friends, or
do you want find one special person to settle down with for a lifetime? Keep in mind that common goals are often
more
important in a relationship than individual interests.
Age isn't everything, but.... it is where a lot of people start. Be sure to include your
age in
the ad. If you don't want to give your exact age, narrow the range: "early twenties" or "mid forties" for example.
If you
are fifty but feel thirty,why not say so? If you are looking for someone outside your age range, give a range for
the
person you seek as well. Keep in mind that some people will be suspicious of a range that seems too wide - such as
"twenty
to sixty" - and this may limit responses. Likewise, a range too narrow (one to two years) also seems odd. Even
those who
fall in the narrow range might be hesitant to respond. Stating your age, and avoiding ranges altogether, is
generally the
best approach.
Describe yourself first. Be careful to avoid creating a personal ad that is simply a
mile-long
list of characteristics you seek in another, without saying much about yourself. It's better to let the person
reading the
ad decide if they might be a match. This does not mean that you shouldn't say anything about what you're looking
for, just
don't overdo it. You don't want to be too picky.
Details, details. How many times have you read a personal ad that states: I enjoy movies,
music,
and going out.? This sentence describes millions of people! The idea is to make yourself stand out from the rest!
Instead,
name a recent movie that you enjoyed. List some of your favorite music styles, song titles, or artists. If you
enjoy going
out to Italian restaurants, or line-dancing at a country bar on Saturday nights, say so! Ironically, it is the very
details
that are often overlooked as being insignificant or boring which in fact add the color and depth necessary for a
personal
ad to be truly effective.
Honesty is the best policy. Above all, be honest when describing yourself. No matter who
you are,
or what kind of person you are looking for, you have a better chance of finding that person - and with less
disappointment
along the way - if you are honest from the beginning.
Online dating services are fun places
to meet new people, and the friends you'll meet online can
be the most loving you'll ever know. Chatting online or
through email is safe, but meeting someone in person that
you've met on the net for the first time needs a bit of
common sense.
1. Use your
instincts. We know you want to trust everyone and
believe everything they say, especially when they're saying
what you want to hear. If it's too good to be true, it sometimes
is. More often than not, the person you've met online is
just the same in person, but take your time to get to know
her/him/them.
2. Remain
anonymous. Until you know that the person or persons
you're interested in are the sort you want to meet, remain
anonymous. Most online dating services allow you to use
a nickname and send mail using only the nickname and your
dating service address. Don't be pressured to "send
mail to my private email" because you'll be giving
our your personal details in your return address.
3. Remain
wary. Don't believe everything you see on screen.
If you have any doubts, ask questions. If there is even
the slightest bit of doubt, move on. There are SO many people
out there that could make you happy, so don't take a chance.
4. Don't
be pushed! If you're not ready to meet someone, don't
be coerced into it. You'll be upset and you might be putting
yourself at risk. So what if you're accused of "not
being real", at least you'll feel good until you ARE
ready to meet in person.
5. Spend
time online. If you're not 100% certain this person
is for real, spend time online chatting or chat through
email until you're sure.
6. Talk
on the phone. You can learn a lot about someone by
talking over the phone. To ensure your anonymity, give a
mobile phone number or use a pay phone. If you hear anything
that gives you doubts, don't meet.
7. Photos.
It's true that a picture is worth 1000 words. It doesn't
tell the whole story, but you can tell whether you're physically
attracted to this person. If the photo looks too good to
be true, ask for a photo to be taken somewhere you suggest.
If it can't be done, it might not be their photo!
8. Personality
flaws. If your new friend displays controlling behavior
(needs to know where you are, is unhappy when you do things
away from the computer), shows anger or anything else that
makes you feel uncomfortable, then this person is not going
to make you happy. If you're an outgoing, friendly man,
a clinging, dependent woman will drive you up the wall.
9. Be safe.
When you decide to meet for the first time, tell someone
where you're going. Take your own car, public transportation
or ask a friend to take you and pick you up. These security
measures won't last forever and if he or she is put off
by them, then tell them to find someone else. There is never
going to be only one person that you must have in order
to be happy.
10. Always
be alert. Safety precautions are not only for meeting
new friends from the Internet. These guidelines are good
ideas whether you're meeting someone you've met at a concert,
in a pub or at the grocery store. Just be careful out there.
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